Sunday, June 28, 2015

A to Z Challenge~ X-Rays and Being seXy

Welcome back to the Spanking from A-Z blog challenge, hosted by Celeste Jones and Spanking Romance Reviews.

I made it all the way to X! I feel like celebrating every post that I get posted toward the end here. Here is my 28th and third to last post!

I tried to think of something that starts with X and an obvious choice would be X-rays. About six weeks ago I had some X-rays and confirmed that I had fractured two bones in my ankle (because go big or go home).

I am healing up nicely and am thankful it wasn't worse. And I have friends that keep joking that I bought myself a summer vacation. Which I guess would be true if I hadn't spent almost every single day of these last six weeks filling out forms, following up on forms, calling doctors, calling my human resources department, calling the disability company, and navigating through automated answering services (I do want to stab automated recordings repeatedly).

Most days I am so fed up and frustrated by lunchtime that I don't even want to talk to another soul—which makes life really interesting for Mr. McKay who works from home and is stuck waiting on me all day.

Then there is having sex, or even trying to be sexy. You know when you are jumping around on one foot and balancing on crutches in the summer, you get extra sweaty. You dress for comfort and that's it and wearing a bra is optional. As a result I feel very un-sexy.

I am a lingerie girl. I realized very quickly that while my husband does enjoy it, I mostly wear it for me. It makes me feel sexy. Do you know what wouldn't be sexy? Wearing lingerie with a cast, I'm guessing it would just look sad. I am not completely sure because I haven't tried it, but it would probably make me feel silly and not sexy.

Needless to say, my sex drive has taken a nose dive. I mean, things still happen—I'm not dead, but I've just been feeling a lot less desirable and a lot less in the mood. 

The other day Mr. McKay took me out with him when he had to run some errands. I sat in the car with the window cracked, getting some sun and fresh air. Then he drove us to sit by the water. I hopped out of the car and hobbled over to a bench where we sat and watched some boats go by. It's one of our favorite places.

I had on a t-shirt and some yoga pants. My hair was in a frizzy messy, makeshift bun. I hadn't even put contacts in, my glasses were smudged and I couldn't even remember if I had applied deodorant. I had spent most of my morning navigating through an automated answering system that kept telling me "I'm sorry, I do not understand your answer" even when I was shouting "REPRESENTATIVE" into the phone. I felt disheveled and emotionally frazzled.

Mr. McKay slung his arm around my shoulders and leaned in to kiss me. "Your boobs look massive today."

I glance down, yeah they did for some reason. My t-shirt was stretched across the chest and I idly wondered if perhaps I had packed on a few pounds since I had been laid up. This could have been a depressing thread of thought, but then he followed it up with, "You're so hot."

The romance writer in me wants to change his wording and say he called me beautiful. But he didn't. It actually made me want to laugh because it sounded really juvenile and caught me off guard. My husband thinks I'm hot, even when I'm feeling unattractive. He commented on he ride home that he was 'having the best day'. Which also made me smile because the day had consisted of stopping at three stores and taking his broken wife to sit on a bench. He just liked having me with him.

So I didn't feel sexy. But I did feel appreciated and loved. And we did have some sex. With an X and no Y. And that's okay.

I also wrote a short story this month for our newsletter, it's called A Naughty Patient and it may or may not be based on true events. It's about a girl who breaks her ankle and is having a hard time letting her man take care of her. I'll let you wonder which parts are real...

It's going out in the next day or so—sign up here if you haven't already!!