Friday, February 26, 2016

A Modern Day Romance~ Life of a Boring Married

I've been slacking on the blogging lately. To be honest, I've been slacking on the writing. It's dumb really, all I want to be when I grow up is be a full-time writer, but life gets in the way.

My day job has taken over. All good things. I have a new position which brought on some training and I am working new hours. I'm enjoying it, but adjusting. There seems to be less time for author and publishing stuff. And then I spend the time I have on publishing stuff and then my author stuff suffers. And when I have time to write (like right now) the words won't come—I stare at a blank screen and think about all the other things I could be doing with my time.

On top of that, I am back into the roller derby swing of things, complete with a fresh crop of bruises and a sore ache-y body from practice this week. Nothing better to make a girl feel alive!

And then there's this man I live with. You know, my husband, that guy I say hi to in passing when I whisk in from work and then back out with my derby gear. Oh yeah, him.

I think that's the problem with the blogging and writing as well, I often like to blog about the kinkier side of life. The spanking, sex and crazy fun we've been enjoying. Is it terrible to admit there has been none?

There's been nothing of that sort to blog about. I'm not lamenting or looking for sympathy. And I know it won't last forever. I think it's something that happens now and again. Nothing is wrong with us, life is happening. Outside stressors and things keep popping up. Family issues, health things, just all around suck-age.

If anything this short-term, sex-less, kink-less period has made me appreciate the marriage I have and the man I am sharing my life with. When the day has completely beaten me down and my feet are aching as hard as my soul, there's no one else I want to collapse onto the couch with. We sit in companionable silence and watch shows that have piled up on our DVR. Or we run some errands together and talk about anything and everything on the car ride. 

Is sex important in a relationship? Yes, I think it is. But I also think, since delving into the kinkier side of things, we have come to realize that communication is probably the most important thing in any relationship. I can get through this unsexy time because we're doing it together.

Life's been boring with nothing much to talk about. Maybe we've become boring married people. I'm trying to find the proper outrage within myself. I definitely never aspired to be a boring married person. But when you see the person you decided to spend the rest of your life with struggling and hurting and all you can do is hug them and tell them you get it. Kiss them and tell them you wish you could fix it. From the problem he's having at work to the biggest of life's biggest unfair things. And he smiles at you and says he knows, and he loves you.

And you realize you're his person. I mean, I've known all along that he's my person. You know, the person that can make everything seem better by doing nothing at all, but just being there for you. I guess I knew somewhere deep down that it probably did go both ways. I just didn't realize it until recently.

So here we are. The very (at this moment) un-exciting McKay's slogging through life much like the rest of the world. Is it any wonder I can't seem to finish this book jam packed with sex and kink and other lovely things? It's coming I swear.

In the meantime, I am in the middle of editing some very deliciously erotic, downright panty-dampening things that will be coming to you soon!

I'm sure life will be back to normal soon. Actually, this probably is normal. The ebb and flow of things, or life in general. Sometimes you just have to take a step back and figure shit out.


  1. Ahhh....all marriages go thru highs and lows. You'll be swinging soon! Lol

    1. Thanks, Marybeth! I know it's only temporary.

  2. Ahhh....all marriages go thru highs and lows. You'll be swinging soon! Lol

  3. Oh Casey, I love being a boring married person! I would hate to be without my hubby, no matter what life throws our way we are superglued together, just like you and Mr McKay. I hope his troubles lesson soon (and you finish the book :)
    love Jan, xx

    1. Thanks, Jan! I wouldn't want life without my husband either. The book is almost finished which is the most frustrating part! I just need a little more time and energy to bring it around to the end. Thanks for popping in :)