Sunday, August 2, 2015

A Love/Hate Relationship and High Five Worthy Sex

My birthday was this week. It came and went, but we took time to celebrate and we re-connected in a way we had not been able to since I broke my ankle.

Our sexual escapades since mid-May have been pretty much non-existent. Sure we've had sex since then, there had even been some spanking. But we never went all out kinky and there was always an air of caution.

I was still hindered with the medical boot on my actual birthday. But getting around much better, pain has been minimal and mobility has been good, so I was ready to rock!

Mr. McKay did some online shopping and got me some kinky sex toys (which always leads to interesting conversations with other people in our lives: "So what'd you get for your birthday?" Uh...nothing).

Among these gifts were a leather slapper and a new butt plug. I was super excited about both. We had a leather paddle, I guess it was kind of flimsy and cheap because it started coming apart (on my ass) which was unpleasant.

Mr. McKay shopped around and bought a heavier duty one. It is called a slapper, which I get why it's called that because it consists of two pieces of leather that slap together and make a slapping sound. But I feel like 'slapper' makes it sound like it's a kid's toy. Like those little plastic clapper hands, anyone know what I'm talking about?

I was a tiny bit crestfallen. The package said "slapper" I mistakenly thought "toy" and also mistakenly thought that it had two pieces slapping together to make it sound loud when really it would not be a hard strike.

You notice I said "mistaken" many times? Yep. Just keep reading.

The butt plug is stainless steel and has a green jewel on the base. I was excited! We had a glass one that cracked and I have always wanted to try stainless steel. Plus, the green jewel matches a set of lingerie I have and I get so excited about matching things!

I got a few other things we have not tried out yet, so I will wait to post about them.

Our night started out with me getting on my lingerie (first time since the breakage), I forgot how sexy lingerie can make me feel. Of course, it was a bit downplayed by they giant boot, but you know, far sexier than the yoga pants I've been living in.

Then the butt plug. Heavy, cold, pretty awesome :)

Then, hey, I guess we'll try out this slapper. I'm still bent over the bed and looking away, so I am not entirely prepared with the first smack. My eyes go wide and I rear my head up. Yeah, it was loud from the "slapping" of the leather pieces. The he smacks me again.

The pain registers this time and I yell out. One more and I am done.

"Ow, ow, ow! Stop!" I roll over onto my back. Wtf? What the hell is this thing?

I very rarely ever ask Mr. McKay to stop a spanking. I want spankings, all the time. Even if I am not really in the mood, if he initiates I am not turning him down. It's taken us a long time for it to get to the point where he actually spanks hard enough. Sometimes I have to fight with myself to not ask him to stop. Because he will. If I say stop, he stops.

Sometimes I wish he wouldn't because sometimes I say it but don't mean it. But not this time. 

We both froze, me still laying back awkwardly on the bed, my hands covering my naked ass. Him standing before me with the newly acquired paddle.

He gives me a puzzled look. 

I have instant regret. I remember it has taken us a long time to get to this point. I had to beg and cajole into some spankings. I had to reassure and reassure more that I liked it and wanted it, and yes it hurt, but I wanted it to hurt. And I am so so so scared that I just undid all of that. Years of growth, in one moment.

Words rush to my mouth. "I meant stop, for now. Not all the time."

He looks unsure.

"I was caught off guard! It's heavier than I thought. It's heavy right? I mean, like, no joke. But I want more," I say. Then I eye the thing again. "Later. Not now. I need to..." What do I need? My ass still stings. I want more. But good god, what is this weapon?

The Best/Worst Thing Ever

I get a smile. "Relax, let's have drinks."

So we did. We drank. We ate guacamole. We watched some TV. Is this our foreplay? Perhaps it is.

We go back upstairs and I requested the Magic Wand, because it is my birthday after all. So with the plug in and the wand on, I am back over the end of the bed.

He starts out with these light slaps of the leather paddle. I quickly look over my shoulder and scowl, "You can go harder than that! I wasn't prepared before."

"Relax. I'm just starting up!" He gives me a look and I turn back around.

I think this is my new thing to love to hate. God. It was hard and intense and just...what I needed. Coupled with the wand and the plug. I came and came. And then I tried to twist away from the spanks. He caught the tops of my thighs and I almost got away but he pushed me back down.

It was amazing!

And then I squirted. Which is always a bizarre feeling, if you ask me, but Mr. McKay was pretty proud of himself. 

We had amazing anal sex. Like, I don't want to brag, but we have a terrible track record. Between height differences and bad backs, and just freak things happening. It was like, high-five worthy, fuck yeah, we got this! Amazing.

He finished on my face and chest. I was still riding the euphoric afterglow of an orgasm. My body was vibrating in pleasure. You know it's good when your legs are shaking and you need to sit for a second before you can regain the power of speech.

If you had told me ten years ago that some of the best sex in my life would consist of being called a whore and having cum on my face I would have thought you were crazy. It would have secretly excited me, but I would have denied it. Luckily, I got over that and can admit what I like.

It was a good night. One I think we will remember for a long time. One we will probably judge future nights against. It's nice to have that once in a while. 

Afterwards, we laid in our bed together, groggy with sleep, sticky messes and I said it might have been my best birthday ever. But really, it didn't matter it was my birthday. It was just one of the best nights we had had in a long time and it was much needed.


  1. I get that moment when you don't want to say stop because it might work against you in the long run - halt the journey rather than the moment. Your ten years sounds like ours! I don't think I could have predicted the sex the way we have it now.

    1. It has been a journey! Luckily he seemed undeterred, even with all my whining.

  2. Oh, I LOVED this post. I always love hearing about you and Mr McKay.It's like a very spank-heavy sitcom. And Yay! to birthdays/paddles/butt plugs/anal sex/squirting/having your lover come on your face. High fives all round!

    And I am very impressed at you accessorising to the extent that your butt plug matches your lingerie, you are just so very, very classy.

    1. Haha, we are pretty much a sitcom. Most times a very boring one, but we have our moments :)

  3. Wow, sounds like the perfect birthday to me!!! I'm jealous!

  4. Oh Casey, nice birthday! Hope you have lots of nights like that
    love Jan,xx